This Too Shall Pass

I have been holding it for far too long
I have been denying it for quite awhile
I have been enjoying it more than I should
I have been forcing it excessively
I have been prolonging it by many years
I have been crossing boundaries insensitively
I have been fantasizing it continuously

I have been hallucinating it too frequently
I have been falling too deeply
I have been going in circle too many times
I have been maintaining it too intensely
I have been depending on it all the time
I have been believing it too innocently
I have been opening up too comfortably
I have been expecting it uncontrollably
Now that I have accepting it, this too shall pass...

Frequency Modulation

When this zone seems far beyond me and no one seems to understand,

One frequency could simply get me
One frequency that could ignite segmented jokes
One frequency that I actually listen to
One frequency that I actually look up to
One frequency that I could relate to
One frequency that I don't think would be exist
One frequency that I've been denying

One frequency that warms the cold air
One frequency that ease the difficulties
One frequency that challenges my mind
One frequency that gives solutions to most of the problems
One frequency that keeps me company
One frequency that comforts me
One frequency that was always there
One frequency that seemingly could activate many of the same neurological systems that are triggered after cocaine use
One forbidden frequency.

A Letter to Popeh

Images of you,
Chilling on your favourite couch
Smiling and staring closely at me
Holding my hands so tightly
Like you've been saying goodbye
Images of you lingering still

You taught me,
That family comes first
That knowledge multiplies when divided
That nothing is gained without hard work
You taught me a lot about life
I hope I live your legacy

Missing you,
Like a heartache that never goes away
Like an unfinished puzzle
Like Puff Daddy missing Notorious B.I.G.
Missing you every single day and night

I believe you are safe and sound
I believe you are in a much better place
I believe you are always with me
I believe what Frost said about life, "It Goes On"

See you on the other side, Popeh!

Love,
ASP


(Jakarta, 10 May 2015)

Familiar Stranger

Suspicious look behind a transparent layer
Conventional pattern wrapped around a definite movement
Plain surface without anything left covered
Surrounded by a strong, gentle and masculine scent
Heavy sound with the calming effect on the universe



Safe and sound, Familiar Stranger,
Making an orchestra playing inside the heart
Non stop scrutinizing eye contact
Always wanna cherish the moment
Even every little piece of heart is starting to break reacting to the absence


No idea who you are but yet so familiar
No idea what you like but yet so familiar
No idea where you're from but yet so familiar
No idea why you're familiar but yet so Strange.

Happy Birthday Summer Breeze

Summer breeze blowin my mind
surprisingly that you are my kind
fulfilling and emptying at the same time
what i feel when i'm with you is a prime

Summer breeze please don't go
i know you've been saying no
part of me would say i told you so
it's my cue to let you go

Summer breeze let me fly
teach me how to get by
encourage me to achieve my dreams
unconsciously you become my channeling streams

Summer breeze please don't go
i know you've been saying no
part of me would say i told you so
it's my cue to let you go

Summer breeze complete my soul
can't believe you can make me whole
sometimes you know me better than myself
understanding without trying to lose oneself

Summer breeze please don't go
i know you've been saying no
part of me would say i told you so
it's my cue to let you go

Whatevership

Have you ever felt something that you've never felt before? It took you by surprise the mighty energy of attractions coming from an unexpected human being. No matter how hard you've been trying to deny it, it just keeps coming back to you.

Images of those sleepless nights: constant conversations with random laughter under the green umbrella, drive along the empty streets guided by city lights, sing along the guitar strumming under a cold rainy night, dance away the fear with a rapid heartbeat, walk along a crowded space with fingertips across the skin, a non-stop chats arguing over silly matters, multiple hidden confessions through continuous song references, long calls of exchanging each other's life story, those nights that sometimes were a blur of vodka or whisky, Images of those sleepless nights.

Simultaneously assuming it's all only in your mind which scares the images away, on and off withdrawal from things that you really wanna say or do, over-thinking every single thing instead of just feeling it, you keep building new illussions to shield you from reality or the truth, even though you can't even tell what's real and what's not.

How come something that happens so instantaneously are so hard to be let go? As if there's some kind of irresistible force that draws you two together, although, you don't know whether the only thing that keeping you two apart is maybe a success or a failure to embrace your destiny.

...Suddenly Complete Me

a pirate who hijacks my mind...
a jar of nutella that sweetens my days...
a ghost that haunts my surrounding...
a set of crayons that color my life...
a thousand needles that stab my heart
a moon that changes my mood...
a lantern that brightens my path...
a gloomy cloud that darkens my afternoon...
a muse that inspires my work...
a hunch that steals my sanity...
a clown that drowns my sorrow...
a trigger that sets off my anger...
a lullaby that tightens my sleep...
a noise that distracts my peace of mind...